Monday, February 14, 2011

Healing of Memories: Phase III: Beneath the Screen

Healing of Memories: Phase III: Beneath the Screen
Healing of Memories: Phase III: Beneath the Screen by ElianaHephzibah on Polyvore.com
This collage and phase of memory recovery and healing was the most difficult for me to remember, recount, and construct. It is indeed horrific to bring to light. But the rewards from dealing with things at this depth of my being have been great. Remembering this and putting all of the pieces together was the key that finally set me free from my phobia of dental procedures. Getting external validation of this memory only served to boost my confidence and solidify the memory for me and help me believe that these things, indeed, did happen to me.

Healing of Memories: Stage II: Prayer

Healing of Memories: Stage II: Prayer
Healing of Memories: Stage II: Prayer by ElianaHephzibah featuring striped tops

After the terrible memory surfaced about the trauma from the first collage of this series, I got together with my support persons and we prayed that Jesus would come into the middle of that trauma and heal it. Inside, I could see the selves who could not speak and Jesus arrived and touched a fiery coal to their mouths and suddenly they could speak and were able to experience peace and hope.

After this prayer, I was able to find a dentist to perform the major procedure I needed to have. I still had to take an anti-anxiety medication beforehand and nitrous gas during, plus some major self talking inside.

I got through it successfully, but the fear was still there, just lessened. I still could not find the courage to schedule regular cleanings and check-ups.


Healing of Memories: Stage I: Listening

Healing of Memories: Stage I: Listening
Healing of Memories: Stage I: Listening by ElianaHephzibah on Polyvore.com
I have had a serious phobia of dental procedures all my life. Consciously, I have always remembered being very resistant to local anesthetics and so was subjected to terrible, painful procedures while our family dentist ignored my pain. But I always knew inside that there was more... much more.