Thursday, July 28, 2005

A Gothic Treatise

OK. Here we go. This got pretty long. I guess it a treatise of sorts, so I think it covers the subject pretty well. Any questions are always welcomed.
We got involved in the Goth scene in 2001, after we had a bitter falling out with Vineyard. Not that one caused the other, it was just that we had totally wrapped ourselves around church, only hanging around church people, only doing church social activities etc. for the last 10 yrs, the previous 5 in Vineyard and the 5 before that at Oakwood. Both times we had a hard time really fitting in, both times we had a crisis where each wasn't really there for us, and both times we got to the point where we wondered, "If we just didn't show up anymore, would anyone care? Would anyone even notice our absence?" Both times we tested it, and both times we found our feelings and suspicions to be correct.

Sunday, July 24, 2005

Trusting Jesus For Memory Recovery

Back in about 1992 when I first started dealing with the abuse, I really had no memories. Just a lot of signs and symptoms of having been sexually abused. Plus I had this sense of incompleteness, like there was something I didn't know always nagging at me. I hated waiting for flashbacks for memory fragments to pop up. Once, I got fed up with waiting for the memories and decided to utilize some of my self hypnosis techniques from my days involved with the New Age movement. I totally relaxed my whole body and then imagined walking down a flight of steps to a basement while counting backward from 10. This is standard practice for hypnosis.

Friday, July 22, 2005

On Fear And Going Public

[This is a repost from a while ago. This blog was hacked and this post and another were deleted. Apparently someone is threatened by what I write and doesn't believe in the first amendment to the U.S. Constitution.]

This record is not just a nifty place for me to rant. It is a testimony. It is a chronicle of my journey as it unfolds along the way. Already, since its inception, the journey has taken me on surprising twists and turns. My life seemed complicated when I started this, and has only become more so, as well as becoming like some wierd movie. I would probably not believe it if I weren't living it and experiencing it. For awhile, when I first started to discover these things, I was very fearful, but after much thought and struggle, I have come to the decision that I do not want to live my life out of fear, because I have discovered, as Paul Atreides did in "Dune", that "Fear is the mind killer". Once it takes root in ones spirit, it is a dark poison that permeates the whole person and strangles hope. It provides the very fertile ground in which the weeds of despair, and desolation grow.

Anger And Retribution

[This is a repost from a while ago. This blog was hacked and this post and another were deleted. Apparently someone is threatened by what I write and doesn't believe in the first amendment to the U.S. Constitution.]

1 The LORD said to Moses, 2 "Say to the Israelites: 'Any Israelite or any alien living in Israel who gives [a] any of his children to Molech must be put to death. The people of the community are to stone him. 3 I will set my face against that man and I will cut him off from his people; for by giving his children to Molech, he has defiled my sanctuary and profaned my holy name. 4 If the people of the community close their eyes when that man gives one of his children to Molech and they fail to put him to death, 5 I will set my face against that man and his family and will cut off from their people both him and all who follow him in prostituting themselves to Molech. Leviticus 20:1-5

Who is Molech?

As I have been putting together the pieces of my history in the last months, I have often been overwhelmed with rage at everything that happened to me and at the people who put me in harms way. Often too, I have a rage at society in general for choosing to stay blind to the horrors that are going on all around them. Child abuse, ritual abuse, child pornography, child prostitution and many other abominations visited on children are all too common and these things proliferate in part due to the blindness and apathy of the public at large.

One might read the above passage from scripture and not see any relationship to the present day. After all, who is Molech anyway? Nobody worships Molech nowadays do they? That was a long time ago, but we are more rational now, aren't we?

Saturday, July 02, 2005

The Wizard of Oz- A Tool For Mind Control

"It was pure inspiration.... It came to me right out of the blue. I think that sometimes the Great Author has a message to get across and He has to use the instrument at hand. I happened to be that medium, and I believe the magic key was given me to open the doors to sympathy and understanding, joy, peace and happiness."
Hearn, Michael Patrick, ed. The Annotated Wizard of Oz. New York: Clarkson N. Potter,

This is a quote from L. Frank Baum, author of the popular children's book, later made into the movie, The Wizard of Oz which has made such a cultural impact on America in the 20th century and beyond. Baum was a member of the Theosophical Society . Theosophy is a metaphysical tradition loosely based on Eastern Mysticism. Many teachings are incorporated into Baum's famous books. That's just a little background for something that has been used by the Illuminati for purposes of trauma based mind control programming, specifically in Project Monarch.